In the beginning there was The Garden of Eden followed quickly by Brooklyn.

Last year I moved from sunny, friendly, slow (in both movement and minds) Florida to a land of fake "Umpa-Lumpa" tans (on both male and female), the most delicious bagels that seem to have been created from a piece of heaven, people screaming at me for no apparent reason - merely my existence on this earth was enough to raise their blood pressure by a few points, finger nails longer and more decorated than I have ever seen or ever thought possible to own (I mean, how do you open a can of soda or type on a computer with those?), drivers that will hit you and NEVER think twice about it, and most importantly my cause for this blog; the most brightly shining, never ceasing to amaze, colorful bunch of gossiping characters I have ever met.

My blog will consist of short day to day stories and long tales that will continue on for extended periods of time while using false names, but confoundedly true people and stories that I hope you will come to know and love as I do. Most importantly will be the flagrant flaming uses and misuses of profane and "bitch smack your mama" hilarious commentary as heard on the block I reside on, better known as ... The Brooklyn Block.